The Holidays Are Here--Repost

This is an article I wrote for something or another the Thanksgiving after losing my Momma and my husband's grandmother. Thought I would re-post it here...

The holidays are here; have you noticed? Christmas music is already playing; Santa and his reindeer, along with crosses and nativities, are already decorating our yards. I’ve already taken Christmas pictures and even bought most of our Christmas gifts. Many of you are thinking you wish that you could say the same. You are already dreading the run, run, run of Christmas and Thanksgiving isn’t until next week.

That very thought seemed stuck in my mind this last week. Stuck enough for me to sit down and really give it some thought. We seem to glide over Thanksgiving here lately in an effort to “get Christmas taken care of”. But what are we missing in the process? Last year, I can remember wishing that I could just skip it all. The worry, the stress, the wondering what you’ve forgotten that you won’t remember until someone hands you the card, gift, or invitation… know the feeling? But my outlook severely changed this year.

Thanksgiving last year could have been a lot better. I spent the day angry because I was not with “my” family, angry at situations in my family’s lives that I had no control over, and most of all, stressed. If I had only known what changes this year would see I wouldn’t have worried about where I was for Thanksgiving, I would have concentrated more on thanks-giving. The stress wouldn’t have seemed important and I believe (hope anyway!) that I would have spent my holidays in more of a holiday spirit.

You see, there are two very important, very pivotal members of my family that won’t be here for the holidays this year. My husband lost his grandmother. Now I know that in and of itself, that doesn’t say much. But imagine yourself as a child of divorced parents and depending on that grandmother for most of your life to be a mother of sorts. Imagine still that she is truly the center of your family, the central figure, the one that holds it all together and you will begin to know what he and the rest of our family lost.

We also lost my mother this fall. If you’ve lost a parent, you know exactly what I am going to say and why. There is no loss that can even begin to compare to the loss of a mother. She was who I hope to be. She stood for all the things that I hope to become. She was my best friend, my ultimate support, the strongest shoulder, and everything that a mother should be. I will spend the rest of my life wishing she could still be here.

You see if I had known then how it would be this year, I would have treasured those last months of 2001. I would have thanked God for giving me another year to spend Thanksgiving with the ones that were so important in my life. I would have truly experienced the miracle of being so very thankful for those in my life.

I suppose the message that I would want each of you to get from this is simply to treasure today. Be thankful for everyday you spend with your children, your parents, your spouse, and your friends. Unfortunately, we lose people everyday and you never know when your loss is coming.